Key West, Florida

relax|beach: Key West, Florida

by Beth Powell

The Florida Keys are one of my favorite areas and I've visited several times. The Keys are a narrow stretch of islands along the southern tip of Florida. The archipelago extends 127.5 miles and are joined together by highway A1A. which, during that particular segment, is also named U.S. Highway 1. This is one of the best cruises in the US. You'll begin at that coastal-urban buzz of energy that is Miami and end at the Southernmost Point of the United States where a buoy will mark your arrival and serve as your first photo op.

Southernmost Point Buoy, 2011

Nearby is the southernmost beach.

Southernmost beach, 2011

If a person can have a city soul-mate then Key West might be mine. It's warm, funky, friendly, artistic, and tolerant. It makes mistakes and, as such, it doesn't pass out harsh judgments. It's features include beaches, water sports, fishing, diving, music, a literary tradition, and fabulous food. Oh, and speaking of the city's mistakes, who's ready for a history story? Shelby is! Greta is! 

In 1982, the mayor of the Key West tried to secede from the United States, declaring Key West it's own independent country, and calling it the Conch Republic. Texas is basically always threatening secession but these were Floridians so, what prompted this move? The answer lies in this quote that you may have heard before: "It snowed in Miami during the 80's." (As an aside, in 1977 actual snowflakes did fall from the sky to the Miami shores.) However, the quote I've shared is referencing one of cocaine's nicknames and not precipitation. Cocaine use and addiction were big problems then and arguably still are but that's a conversation for a different day. If you don't believe me watch the movie Scarface. 

Cocaine mostly came from Columbia, entering the US primarily through South Florida - Miami and also the Florida Keys. In an attempt to fight the drug trade, road blocks were often set up on U.S. 1, which is the only road in and out of the Keys. These road blocks became a deterrent to tourists who didn't want to spend their vacation caught up in all that hassle. Key West relied heavily on the tourism industry and as a result of these road blocks found itself under additional economic pressure. Therefore, the mayor decided secession was his answer. Mr. Mayor was arrested, and the secession was short-lived, but the name stuck, and to this day the Keys are referred to as the Conch Republic.

Air side at the Key West Airport

One of reasons I really enjoy the Keys is that they are not overrun with blatant commercialism like the rest of Florida, most of the United States, and frankly a decent amount of the world. You can get a Big Mac in 93 different countries and you can get a Coca-Cola in every country. (You shouldn't be able to get a coke in North Korea because Kim Jong-il is a dangerous human rights decimating lunatic and, as such, we've placed an embargo on US goods there, but China cross-ships it to the people in Pyongyang.) 

Now, I'm not saying you can't get a coke or Big Mac in the Florida Keys, because you can, in fact there are 3 McDonald's restaurants in the Keys. What I'm saying is that the area is not as commercial. There isn't a Wal-Mart in the Keys. Did you hear me? No Wal-Mart, and since Wal-Mart and commercialism are synonyms, I think we can safely claim that commercialism is at least dampened in the Florida Keys.

Another reason I like the Keys is that they have personality. America is supposed to be a place that values rugged individualism, where every person has a chance at living out their own Horatio Alger story, pulling themselves up by their bootstraps and going from rags to riches. In reality, many of our cities lack individuality, and the poor typically stay poor, but that's yet another topic for a different blog. Back when I was a road warrior it became obvious that the United States had largely become homogenized.  For example, many airports are located in city outskirts, and most cities have the same strip-mall covered suburbs with out-parcels repetitively occupied by Chili's, Red Lobster, McDonald's, Taco Bell, and the like. Consequently, it's now to the point that upon exiting the rental car facility Cleveland looks like St. Louis, and Charlotte, and Oklahoma City and, well, you get the picture. 

The United Chili's of America
(A graphic I created  about 6 years ago to illustrate the homogenization of the U.S.)

The artist Jasper Johns painted The Map in 1961, and it exemplifies, at least for me, this idea of American homogenization. He's blurred all the state lines and replicated color schemes across the entire nation completely ignoring regionalism. For example, the color scheme in California and Kentucky are similar, but in 1961, California and Kentucky were most certainly culturally dissimilar. To some extent they still are today but removing the differences in geographical terrain, I'll bet you can find places in California that have the same sign cluttered horizon as in Kentucky. I own a copy of this painting and it reminds me to enjoy variety, when and where I find it. 

Jasper Johns, Map

To be clear, I'm not picking on Chili's, I like Chili's, their Southwest Egg Rolls are yum-O, but I can get Southwest Egg Rolls in Oklahoma, and as I've previously mentioned, when I travel I'm looking for something different, preferring to experience local cultures and local flavors. This philosophy comes from my gypsy-soul mother who has had a longstanding travel rule that when you're on vacation you absolutely, positively must eat something new. (I've adopted the same rule so consider yourself forewarned should we ever travel together.) There is no Chili's, Red Lobster or On the Border in the Florida Keys. There are a lot of local restaurants to choose from, and more importantly, in Key West, there is the paradise that is Blue Heaven. 

In my humble and admittedly limited opinion, Blue Heaven is the best breakfast/brunch spot in the whole wide world. You have to save your pennies before going because you'll want to start every day of your vacation there and, I'm telling you, it's worth skipping lunch at home once a month to have the money for this splurge. The restaurant itself is a funky experience, most of the seating is in a tree shaded courtyard, where you'll find local musicians strumming acoustic guitars on a makeshift stage, a center bar sporting an awesome Bloody Mary, and chickens ranging freely. (Chickens free range all over town.) 

Blue Heaven's bar & stage

Once you're seated, please trust me and order the Lobster Benedict. It is out of this world tasty. The hollandaise is key-lime based for a nice twist on the old favorite, and the thinly sliced bacon is the perfect crispy complement to the softness of the muffin, egg and lobster. Oh, the lobster, the sweet delectable lobster - it's perfectly and extravagantly delicious! After your first bite, you'll experience culinary rapture followed by guilt. You will begin thinking you don't deserve to eat the rest, but you do, we all do. We all sin and we all deserve this little slice of Heaven. If you skipped lunch once a month back home you can afford to eat it every day, and if you didn't, whip out the credit card anyway, because it's that good.

Blue Heaven's Lobster Benedict

After treating yourself to the Lobster Benedict you can spend the rest of your day enjoying water sports, like taking SeaDoos around the island and occupying space south of the Southernmost Point.

South of the Southernmost Point

Or, you can visit the Ernest Hemingway Home & Museum. Hemingway first visited Key West in 1928, he took a ship from Paris to Havana, Cuba and then came into Key West. During the transoceanic trip he began a war novel, while he was in Key West he finished it and titled it "A Farewell to Arms."  He and his wife decided to stay in Key West and the Ernest Hemingway Home & Museum was where they lived. There are a lot of other interesting details of their story but I'll let your tour guide fill you in on them during your visit. 

Hemingway Home Front

Hemingway was an early riser who wrote in the mornings and went exploring or fishing in the afternoons. This is where the magic happened.

Ernest Hemingway's writing studio

Sometimes, in the afternoons, his exploring led him to Duval Street where he fed his drinking habit. He was a regular at Sloppy Joe's Bar. The original Sloppy Joe's was located around the corner from today's Sloppy Joe's and is now called Capt Tony's Saloon. Be sure to read the newspapers on the wall at Capt Tony's. Hemingway was still living in Key West when Sloppy Joe's moved. It is reported that he enjoyed cocktails at both establishments. 

Capt. Tony's Saloon a.k.a. original Sloppy Joe's

Present day Sloppy Joe's (although this picture was taken in 1999)

Speaking of Duval Street, the following is a courtesy warning. As I previously mentioned, the city has a tolerant nature and promotes creativity. As a result, it hosts a thriving alternative culture. If that's not your thing don't go during their festivals, especially Fantasy Fest in October. If it is your thing, definitely go to Fantasy Fest. I've heard the body painting is amazing. I personally like creative, laid back places during non-festival times. The festivals and large parties are overwhelming for me. 

I have a lot more to say about this town, but will hold back so this entry doesn't ramble on for too long. On that note, I'll close now with the understanding that there will be future entries about the Florida Keys.

Sunset from a Duval St rooftop, January 2013.